Things I'm Thankful For

So, people love making Thanksgiving "What I'm Thankful For" blog posts. It's true - they do. Well guess what so do I.

These are things I'm thankful for

-First, people - I'm thankful for my loving parents and family, my super kick-ass girlfriend/best friend Adrienne, my super kick-ass roommate/best friend Mara, all of my friends, but for the purpose of this blog only the ones who I know read it, so Joann, Lorianne, Elana, Brooke and Torp (if anyone else reads it, well, I'm sorry, I had no idea) and my cousin Ann, who I know reads and who was very recently responsible, along with myself, for stealing a signed photo of Matt Lauer from a bar after a Squeeze show. Also, I'm thankful for The Dan Ryan and my comedy wife Sarah Walker and by extension, Twinzees.

-Professional wrestling. I know some people think it's lowest common denominator entertainment, but there's an art to it that only people crazy enough to see it get. It's ballet. A weird, testosterone driven ballet. Special thanks to Edge, for being consistently entertaining and to Chris Jericho and Shawn Michaels for working the best program I've seen in, probably, five years.

-Bones. The television show Bones, which is very quietly one of the best, most consistent shows on TV. This is thanks mostly to the two leads David Boreanaz and Emily Deschanel whose chemistry drives the show as a sort of modern day His Girl Friday.

-The Hold Steady. For existing.

-Sam Adams Winer Lager. I know, it's so stupid to put a beer, but I really love the stuff. It's delicious.

-Bits

-Sound Opinions - the world's only rock 'n roll talk show.

-Sports Radio 66 WFAN. I honestly could not live without it.

-The "Murmer" reissue and the "Brighten the Corners" reissue. I'm not sure what it says about me when I get more excited for reissues of records I already own then new records I haven't heard yet. I'm getting old.

-Impressions that my co-workers do - especially Ted's Bruce Springsteen and another one, Mike's Kat Williams and Torp's Keith Hernandez. They're all special in their own way.

-Brunch - It's my favorite thing in the world

-Magazines - They're great.

-The January returns of Big Love and Friday Night Lights, two of my favorite shows.

-TV on DVD. It's really one of the best things to happen in modern technology. You mean I can watch any Roseanne whenever I want? Stop. No, you can and it's great.

-Music Hall of Williamsburg - You mean there's a venue where even I can see the stage? Wow.

-Gossip Girl

-Adrienne's Turkey meatloaf because it's almost better when used for sandwiches following it's initial run.

-The New York Jets - just having a fantastic year.

-The New York Mets - they break my heart every year, but I'd rather have them than not have them, you know?

-1littlefish - for making my blog legit.

-The great comedies of 2008 - Pineapple Express, Forgetting Sarah Marshall, Tropic Thunder and Role Models. I loved them all and Bill Hader was in almost all of them.

I'm sure there's more, but I'm spent so...there's that.

Best Records of 2008 - David Byrne and Brian Eno "Everything That Happens Will Happen Today"

David Byrne and Brian Eno's "Everything That Happens Will Happen Today" is the lead horse in my best of the year list right now.

I can't say enough about this record. Byrne and Eno are an intimidating force. They're much smarter than everyone (a fact made plain in a great quote from former Talking Heads bassist Tina Wymouth. When asked about the friends, she derogatorily said - and this is paraphrased - when they're old they will be each other's only friend because no one else is smart enough) and their music is sometimes very inaccessible.

Some adore their first non-Talking Heads collaboration, 1981's "My Life in the Bush of Ghosts", but I've always found it sort of cold. There are stellar moments, but as a whole I don't revisit it much. The complete opposite is true of "Everything That Happens..." It's warm, inviting and instantly accessible. It's Byrne and Eno inviting everybody to the party rather than having a selective guest list.

In "Bush of Ghosts" Byrne and Eno used found sounds and basically cut and pasted them together in an experiment that pre-dated electronica. The new record relies on actual music and melody - it would sound right at home next to Eno's work with Byrne's Talking Heads.

This is a really good thing. "Everything That Happens..." is a positive, dare I say, pop record with themes of wonder. Byrne's vocals have never been better and the lyrics evoke a childhood curiosity that suits the easy, relaxed vibe of Eno's arrangements.

In short, I love this record. Byrne and Eno have remarked that this was their stab at an "electric gospel" record. Okay. Sounds good to me. Regardless, it's easily one of the best records of the year.

The True Blood finale was bad

Really bad...achingly bad.

Nothing happened! Absolutely nothing. In fact, this post is gonna be really short because I don't remember anything happening and the whole Rene chases Sookie and tries to kill her thing, I was nodding off...literally. This isn't some hollow statement "Oh, it was so bad, I fell asleep." No metaphor. I was falling asleep during what, I'd imagine, was supposed to be the most tense moment of the series.

Here's the verdict:

-Tara's not dead which is a shame.
-Jason, who was completely uninterested in the anti-vampire church while in jail, is now apparently a part of said anti-vampire church.
-I can't remember what happened with Sookie and Bill, but it was boring and Bill almost burned to death which actually would have been great.
-I kind of, sort of like the Balfour brothers and I'm interested in why Andy has such an ax to grind re:Jason.
-Funniest moment of the year - Arlene digging through Rene's box and finding the cassette titled "Cajun Dialect for Actors." It was so faux tense. I laughed out loud.

All in all True Blood was and is so very bad. I'm glad it's coming back though, because I really love to hate it. See you next summer, Sookie!

Meanwhile bring on Margene!

Twilight - The Final Verdict

Alright, so Twilight the movie was fine. Just fine. Here were the best parts...

-Anna Kendrick as Jessica - Without a doubt the best thing about the movie. Great timing, super funny - she nailed it. In fact, the best stuff in the entire movie was the high school stuff. It's amazing that I find all of these minor characters scores more interesting than both Bella and Edward.

-Charlie in the movie is way better than Charlie in the book.

-As suspected they cut out a lot of talking. In fact, there were some really quick unintentionally funny moments wherein music would swell and you would see Bella and Edward talking to each other, but wouldn't hear it. Thank God.

-The movie had a sense of humor, which I was shocked by.

-Three words - Edward plays piano. This is the funniest thing in the movie. It's almost worth the price of admission for how ridiculous it is.

-The "baddie" vampires are in the whole movie instead of just at the precise moment where Stephanie Meyer realized there was no action in her story.

-Alice's badass killing of James.

Alright, here are the bad parts...

-Robert Pattinson - He's really not a good actor.

-Not enough Jacob - I happen to like Jacob. Apparently he comes into play much heavier in the later books and becomes a possible love interest for Bella. There are some fans who claim to be in Team Jacob as opposed to Team Edward. I don't fall into either camp, but I like the actor who played Jacob much better than Robert Pattinson.

-The last 200 pages of the book make up for about ten minutes of screen time, which is a shame because the last 200 pages of the book were the only interesting part. Put it this way - it was really easy for Bella to get away from Alice and Jasper.

-Not enough Alice. I love Alice. She's my favorite character in the book. She's barely in the movie.

-Did I mention Robert Pattinson is not a good actor? He's not.

-The Twilight series hates sex. Hates it.

All in all the film was overwrought like the books and ultimately unsatisfying. Twilight baffles me. I should love it, but I don't. I'm still gonna read the next book though.

Let's Hope For Berlin

This is amazing. Absolutely amazing. I almost feel bad for Kristen Stewart here. Key word is almost. It's a really bad interview, but not in a Lauren Conrad way, more in a "alright, Kristen Stewart you may act it, but I'm positive you don't have anything better going on. Show some enthusiasm, you're on Letterman for god's sake.



To see a young actress absolutely nail her first Letterman interview look no further than Blake Lively...



And I don't even like Blake Lively all that much, but she's really good at being interviewed by David Letterman, that's for sure.

Best of 2008 Part 1

So, the end of the year is fast approaching - that time of year for my most pretentious pasttime - telling you what the best records of the year are!!!

So, I usually do top 20. I don't know how it's going to work this year. I think I'm going to just start writing about random records that I thought were great this year here and there and then when it really comes close to the end of the year I'll post the definitive list.

These are all the records in contention in absolutely no order. This may change as I may have forgotten something. We'll see.

Blitzen Trapper - Furr
Okkervil River - The Stand Ins
Los Campesinos! - Hold on Now Youngster
Titus Andronicus - The Airing of Grievances
The Hold Steady - Stay Positive
No Age - Nouns
Cadence Weapon - Afterparty Babies
Calexico - Carried to Dust
The Cool Kids - The Bake Sale
David Byrne and Brian Eno - Everything That Happens Will Happen Today
Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds - Dig! Lazarus Dig!
Lucinda Williams - Little Honey
Deerhunter - Microcastle
Department of Eagles - In Ear Park
Drive By Truckers - Brighter Than Creations Dark
Dr. Dog - Fate
Evangelicals - The Evening Descends
Fleet Foxes - Fleet Foxes
Frightened Rabbit - The Midnight Organ Fight
Times New Viking - Rip It Off
The Gaslight Anthem - The '59 Sound
Girl Talk - Night Ripper
The Gutter Twins - Saturnalia
Islands - Arm's Way
Jennifer O'Conner - Here With Me
Kathleen Edwards - Asking For Flowers
The Kills-Midnight Boom
The Last Shadow Puppets- The Age of the Understatement
Lyle Lovett - It's not Big It's Large
M83 - Saturday Youth
Marnie Stern - This is it...
Martha Wainwright - I Know You're Married...
The Mountain Goats - Heretic Pride
Oxford Collapse - Bits
Portishead - Third
REM - Accelerate
Ra Ra Riot - The Rhumb Line
She and Him - Volume One
Shearwater - Rook
Silver Jews - Lookout Mountain, Lookout Sea
Bob Mould-District Line
Steven Malkmus - Real Emotional Trash
Bon Iver - For Emma, Forever Ago
Sun Kil Moon - April
Tim Fite - Fair Ain't Fair
TV on the Radio - Dear Science
Jenny Lewis - Acid Tongue
The Walkmen - You and Me
The War on Drugs - Wagonwheel Blues
Wolf Parade - At Mount Zoomer
Be Your Own Pet - Get Awkward
Black Mountain - In the Future
Death Cab For Cutie - Narrow Stairs
Beck - Modern Guilt

Twilight - I'm ready to get this over with.

Alright, so I've got Twilight at ten o'clock. I finished the book last night and let me tell you - Eeesh. Not good. I can still see it being a decent enough movie because they will have to cut out at least fifty percent of the book. Parts like - Bella and Edward talking, Bella and Edward brooding, Bella and Edward lacking any sort of sense of humor, Bella and Edward asking each other questions and then answering them and vice versa, Bella and Alice talking, Alice drawing, Jasper and Alice talking, Jessica and Bella talking etc. etc.

It moves at a snails pace. There is no action. In fact the only action in the whole book (the James/Edward fight) doesn't even happen. I mean it does, but Bella's passed out so we only hear about it. It does look like it's actually going to happen in the movie, which is a plus.

Also, that scene in the trailer when they're high in the trees, that's not in the book and it looks awesome. So, hopefully the movie takes liberties on the books many deficiencies. This might make teenage girls mad, but it will make me happy.

I have to say, I'm not so big on this Twilight thing. It's the first YA thing that has actually made me feel creepy - and I watch Degrassi. I could always justify things like Degrassi though, because come on, I love it for the cheese factor. And the Gilmore Girls because the writing was sharp and they made Sonic Youth references and the characters were quirky and interesting. Not Twilight. Twilight has none of those things. Twilight feels like it was made for child molesters.

Which is why I find it weird that adult women love these books. It's kind of gross. To me, this all or nothing relationship between Bella and Edward is so high school where every moment is of the utmost importance and everything is the end of the world. It's pretty real in those cases, but shouldn't most adults look back on those things and be grossed out by them and not want to revisit them.

Further, a lot of these adult women who love these books have daughters. Would they want their teenage daughters pledging things like "I'd rather die than be without you" to any boy at that age, especially a boy they just met. It seems to be sending the wrong message.

Lastly, grown women lusting after the Edward Cullen character is as creepy as it gets. I know, I get it - he's supposed to be 100 years old, but he looks like a high school kid and is in love with a high school girl - which 100 years old or not makes him a teenager. Gross.

Alright, I'll be back later tonight or, more than likely tomorrow, for thoughts on the movie.

1 day until Twilight

I'm actually getting sick of Twilight. It's actually a bit frightening the way girls are reacting to this thing. They're screaming and crying. Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart were on the Today show this morning and it was super weird. I'm pretty sure Kristen Stewart hates Robert Pattinson because he's kind of creepy and clearly in love with her and she's like "no thanks." My favorite is her answer to the question as to why she thought Pattinson should play Edward...



"I shop at used book stores" aside, I kind of like Kristen Stewart.

Anyway, the book is just about done and it's not really exciting. They really just talk about stuff. They sit in places and talk and talk and talk. Stephanie Meyer is not a good writer.

My excitement level is down almost to "Can I just get this over with already"

Two Pat facts...Enjoy

1.) I love AC/DC.

(Here are bands that AC/DC is better than - Guns 'N Roses, Led Zeppelin, Metallica, Kiss and Van Halen. Here are bands that AC/DC is not better than - Judas Priest, Iron Maiden, Aerosmith, Black Sabbath, Thin Lizzy and Joan Jett and the Blackhearts.)

2.) I don't watch any incarnation of Bravo's Real Housewives series. I know when you're watching Top Chef or Project Runway and you see the commercials for "The Real Housewives of some place or another" you probably think, "I bet Pat watches those shows and I bet he loves them" because it looks like I would and because you often spend time thinking about my television watching habits. Truth is, I've never seen an episode. It's not for any high horse reason and I'm not judging you if you like those shows at all. It just so happens I've never seen it.

Twilight update

Alright, so this is three posts in a row that deal with vampire related topics. Couple that with all the True Blood stuff and this blog is becoming scarily goth.

Anyway, I bought my tickets for Twilight today and I got a little further in the book and business has picked up. Bella just had to tell Charlie she was leaving since "the hunter" is after her. There was a lot of fast driving and Edward telling everyone what to do and there was baseball, which seemed odd.

I'm positive the movie will be way better than the book and as a result my excitement level has increased to really excited.

Something I love today

Videogum posted this video yesterday and I'm obsessed with it.



It really makes me laugh. In my DJ Bobo research though, I came across some pretty disappointing news. He's not actually one of those weird dudes who thinks he's a vampire. It's just a song. In fact DJ Bobo is huge in Switzerland, like super-duper huge, like Madonna huge. He's got a million songs - they are mostly all bad, but still he's got a million of them and he's super popular so he gets the last laugh.

Anyway, "Vampires Are Alive" is still really funny. I especially like this line - "Tonight is the night of a thousand years/Don't be scared, don't drown in tears." When he heard it, my friend Jay said "yep, those words rhyme." That's funny.

Twilight countdown

Alright, so I'm absolutely swept up in the hype surrounding Twilight, which comes out on Friday and which I will see that night. Truth is though, I'm reading the first book now and I actually kind of hate it. I'm almost done and it really feels like nothing has happened. I'm 350 pages in and all that fighting and stuff that you see in the movie's trailer hasn't even happened yet. Hell, I haven't even gotten to the reveal that Jacob is a werewolf. All they do is talk. "Do you have questions?" "Yes and I'm going to ask some now." And then they ask each other questions. Shit it was 200 pages before she even found out he was a vampire.

I thought I would be way more swoony for it and I'm just not.

But alas, it's a big pop culture moment so I'm in.

My big question though, will it make $65,000,000 in it's first weekend? I'm actively hoping it does.

I'll be updating my Twilight excitement status throughout the week. Right now it's pretty excited.

I was way more excited for Nick and Norah though. Apparently I only get excited for movies based on YA novels. I don't even want to think about what that says about me.

Beyonce corners the market on awesomeness

I had always held up Beyonce's "Crazy in Love" as the benchmark for the modern R&B/dance single. It's the best one and, honestly, nothing has come close since (Alicia Keys' "No One" may be the closest, but even that's not very close).

Why do I bring this up? Well, Beyonce may have done it. She may have bested herself. I'm not positive yet, but it's damn close. "Single Ladies" may be the best R&B/dance single of the modern era (which I put at, well, the last fifteen years). While the subject matter may be a bit anti-feminist (why should a woman need to be engaged to feel fulfilled in a relationship? Not all women even want to get married), it's infectious groove, killer chorus and "woah,oh, oh's" (also used to brilliant effect in "Crazy in Love")put it in the pantheon.

Congrats Beyonce. You're officially our generation's Tina Turner and that's no easy feat.



PS: While I don't own any Beyonce albums (I imagine there's a lot of filler) there is no way that her greatest hits record is not going to be a five star perfect, all-time top album, like Immaculate Collection good. Think about it, "Crazy in Love", "Ring the Alarm", "Deja Vu","Baby Boy", "If I Were a Boy" "Irreplaceable" and "Single Ladies." Shit!

It's like ripping up emancipation papers for an early Christmas present.

I'm guessing this will not be the majority opinion today, but I really liked Gossip Girl last night. I found it sweet natured and, dare I say it, nice. On a show that's usually so mean spirited and cold, it's kind of comforting when everything ends up working out in the end. I don't want it to happen too often, but as a change of pace every once in a while, I'm on board.

Let's get into it.

-Oh Vanessa. Poor, naive Vanessa. Her description of her Thanksgiving pre-Humdrum Humphrey invite was nauseating. This is paraphrased, but apparently she was not going to spend it with her parents who were staging a vague protest, but rather she was going to go "to her studio" Ugh! "rent Berlin Alexanderplatz" Super Ugh! and "have an Amy's organic" dinner Ugh to the ugh ugh. I rewound it just to hear it twice. Everything about it was annoying. Here's the thing though - I totally bought it. What else would a pretentious 17 year old "artiste" do on Thanksgiving?

-Dorota's fast becoming my favorite character. Her ringtone for Eleanor - "I"m a Slave For You." Priceless stuff.

-Line of the night, as ush, goes to Blair for her disdain at the Rose's daring to take her shopping...at Century 21. I cackled.

(PS: I really need to start writing things down when I watch so I can stop paraphrasing - I did it once, but now I keep forgetting. Sorry)

-I loved how the FBI agent, Vanessa and Chuck had to literally spell everything out for poor, stupid Nate. Or at least I though of him as poor, stupid Nate until Mara said, and I agreed, I don't know what's going on either.

-Aaron is so fucking horrible that I am officially starting to like Dan. Like, actually like him. To the point where I was totally on his side last night. I don't want to like Dan. Please, get rid of Aaron.

-Side bar - I know everyone is pretty convinced that Bart is dying and he probably is, but does anyone want to start a write-in campaign suggesting they rewrite it and make it Aaron?

-Mara hated the episode last night and I kept getting mad at her throughout. Great example is when Nate was delivering his speech to the Captain she was sighing and complaining and I paused it and said "stop, I am trying to have an emotional moment." I'm a fag.

-Another was when she was trying to make sense of the whole Captain kidnapping Nate and his mom. Mara: "Why would her parents pay him off when they won't even give them money now?" Me: "It's fucking Gossip Girl!" She's probably right.

-Everybody hates Lil' J and last night, I certainly called her bad names, but let me submit this - at least she brings drama. Real drama. Let's see, emancipation from parents vs. an idiotic scrufftastic boy learning about your "sordid" past...I'll take the former every time.

-Blair loves holidays...all of them and they never seem to be going her way, but then they do!

-Also, Aaron FUCK OFF! Why can't Serena drink if she wants to. Drinking is fun, you asshole. Does anybody like this guy? Here's how that went down for realz..."So Serena here's the thing I'll stop fucking other girls, but the only way I'll do that is if you stop drinking. I really need you to take care of me." It was blackmail, essentially. I hate him, I hate him, I hate him.

-I love Vanessa stealing the letter at the end. For all the sweetness and light in the show prior to that, it was the quintessential bitchy Gossip Girl moment.

-Memo to the writers: A Pixies box set doesn't exist. Therefore Rufus cannot own it and one step further, since it's imaginary he could not have lent it to Nate.

-Lily is so totally in love with Rufus, though her secret name for him in her cell phone is "R" which doesn't really cover her ass.

-Lily was institutionalized. Big effin deal. I thought those were going to be sex pics.

-How inappropriate was Serena's Thanksgiving dress? Very. But it was still awesome.

-I spent a lot of time trying to figure out Chuck's mothers age. 8/7/69! She wouldn't even be forty. Really? You expect me to believe that she had Chuck at 21? Come on. That was the most unbelievable thing in the show's history.

Alright, I'm spent. I'm grading this one on a curve. I understand the complaints, but I really liked it. Mara actually said it was the worst Gossip Girl ever. I imagine a lot of people would echo that sentiment, which means if she gives it an F and I give in A, I should meet in the middle with a C, but this is my recap and I liked it so...

Final Grade: B

Because I just need it once more, to complete the circle

You may have noticed that I haven't really written about True Blood much lately. Why? Because I've actually liked it for the past few weeks and in my world if you don't have anything bad to say, you probably shouldn't say anything. Where's the fun in that.

But last night? It was bad! Real bad. So, congratulations, True Blood - you're back exactly how I like you...terrible.

You can trace True Blood's slow ascent and quick demise to the arrival (and subsequent killing) of Stephen Root and Lizzy Caplan; or the only two characters on this show that have ever been even remotely interesting.

First, Root's Eddie was the best thing on the show period. He was complex and likable and provided, for just a few moments, some heart in an otherwise freezing cold show. Root's performance was a revelation and makes me hope there is some more dramatic work in his immediate future.

Second, Caplan's Amy. I know, you hate her. Guess what? You're supposed to! To the contrary, you probably also hate Sam and Tara and them you're supposed to like. Unlike pretty much everything else on this show, Amy was intriguing. Why was she at Fangtasia to begin with? and why Jason of all people? Was she really going to quit "V" for Jason, or was she just a sociopath? There were a million possible story threads here infinitely more interesting than Sam as a dog or anything involving Sookie including "the murderer" subplot that's supposedly "driving" the show.

The show really went off the rails last night and there's only one more episode left in the season! The stuff with Bill and Jessica, the Christian girl he "made" into a vampire, was brutal. It was like the worst sitcom ever. Plus, it was devoid of any real emotion - this was supposed to be the hardest thing Bill has ever had to do in his vampire life and it was treated like a throw away moment. Very poorly done.

"Are you looking in my head" "No, I'm looking in your heart" Oh god. Really. There's your True Blood quote of the week, my friends. Pretty much quote of the year. Sums up the horrible hack dialogue that has plagued the show since the first episode.

Faux-nicio Del Toro is the killer. Who cares?

Credit where credit's due - I still don't hate Jason.

Still hate Tara, Tara's mother, Sam, Lafayette, Bill and Sookie though so...

If I were Tara and my mother were refusing to let me come home after I'd put up with all her shit for so long, I would have looked her right in the eye and told her to take a drive to the pharmacy where that fake exorcist works, look for the lady in the ridiculous wig and rip it off and then see if you're still not drinking. Here's the thing, Tara would have done the same thing. Tara's awful. Yet, suddenly she's developed a conscience. Please. Alan Ball knows nothing of consistency.

I liked the way the guy in the diner pronounced the word "vampires"

I guess I'm supposed to be intrigued by this new lady. I'm not...

Thank goodness there's only one episode left.

Is it time for Big Love yet?

I feel guilty that a part of me wants this to be real.

So, this is a National Enquirer picture that is, apparently, Cindy McCain kissing a dude at a Moody Blues show - A dude who is clearly not her husband, Senator John McCain.

Now, this is the National Enquirer so take this grainy snapshot with some measure of skepticism, but holy shit! If this is, in fact, Mrs. McCain - which it probably isn't, but if it is, this is funny on so many levels - not the least of which being that it was taken at a Moody Blues concert.

I'm skeptical in that I don't think Cindy McCain would run around willy nilly kissing middle aged dudes with ponytails at a rock show. However, the pic was taken in Tempe, Arizona and couple that with the fact that a McCain spokesperson declined to comment and we may just have a mini scandal on our hands folks.

Remember that story about people overhearing John McCain calling Cindy a "C"? Well, he may just be getting his comeuppance.

And to think there's is purported to be the "family values" party.

A woman I hated on my walk home from the train

My walk from the train to my apartment is pretty long - it takes somewhere between 20 and 25 minutes. On that walk I often come across people I immediately decide to hate...here's one.

I was walking behind a woman who was talking to a friend on her cell phone, loudly, which is annoying but I'm not as perturbed by that as some. Here's why I hated her - all I heard of her conversation was "I told Sam Champion about it. I emailed him today at work. Ha! Ha! Ha!" and then she repeated it again for the benefit of those who may not have heard her.

Now, this is annoying for both of the possible meanings it could have.

The first, of course, is that this woman actually works with weatherman Sam Champion and wanted people to know that she can have an email correspondence with him at work. This is stupid because, honestly, no one cares about Sam Champion, but it's also quite possible. This is certainly worthy of hate, but it's the other possible reason this woman may have had to make this statement that is actually even worse...

This woman was making a joke about the weather.

It's starting to get cold and this makes some people unhappy. My guess is this woman was having a discussion with a friend of hers about how the change in the weather is displeasing to them, so she was essentially saying, "don't worry I took care of it, I emailed Sam Champion."

Ugh.

It's such a bad joke.

I can't believe that it's worse than dropping Sam Champion's name to try and impress passersby.

Either way, this lady sucked. And I hate her.

Because it's a lot like burning your dresses in a metal garbage can, you know, like a hobo

Oh, Gossip Girl - so good and so bad in just one episode.

Before I even can get started I must thank the GG gods for the casting of Wallace Shawn as Eleanor Waldorf's new man, Cyrus. He's hysterical and it looks like he's going to be around a while, so kudos to Josh Schwarz and staff for bringing in what will certainly be the best part of every episode he's in.

NOT ENOUGH!

I can't say enough about Lieghton Meester's reaction shots. She's the new Bea Arthur, I swear. So often she needs to say absolutely nothing and I still loose it.

Remember when Neli Yuki was brought in by B with the express purpose to...well I don't really remember. Mara and I thought it had something to do with SATs, but i'm positive it was nefarious and now she's part of the clique? Alright.

I hate everything about Aaron. He's Dan Humohrey times ten. He could not possibly be worse. First of all, the maps thing - ridiculous. And someone like Serena Van Der Woodson would not fall for that, any other seventeen year old girl - absolutely, but S is supposed to be sophisticated, right?

Ugh and how creepy was the room with the white sheets and the video of Serena. He's so slimy.

I hate him.

Let's turn to my roommate and friend, Mara Lander, and see what she thinks about the new Serena/Aaron romance (this is taken directly from an email I received this morning. It begins referencing Serena) Really? You’re a free spirit because you wore your beautiful pajamas that are basically a dress to the park? This makes you a hippie? And you’re 17 and casually dating and have a successful art career? Right? We’re supposed to assume that whatever his name is mustache guy is the same age as serena. They went to camp together. And you had a solo show in a happening Bedford gallery and are casually dating your models at age 17. really?

I desperately want Agnes to go away, but strangely not as much as Aaron.

Chuck stuff was blah. I don't need Chuck's daddy issues.

The Dan stuff - super lame. Did you for one second actually think he was going to go through with writing the story? He's a big pussy, just like his father - the worst parent in the world.

Jenny's turn for the worse has been way abrupt.

No Vanessa and no Nate. I miss them when they're not around. It just goes to show what too much S and Lonely Boy can do to make otherwise lame characters missable.

You know what I want? More Hazel! Her delivery on "beggars can't be choosers" as referenced to the weird bus boy with the Flash Gordon hair was kind of Blair-y. In a really good way.

Remember when Lil' J stripped to bra a few weeks back in order to have pictures taken of her by Agnes' pervy boyfriend? Yeah, that guy isn't as creepy as Aaron. (I'm really all over the place with this, but just when I think I'm done with Aaron stuff something else pops in my head and I'm right back at it)

"I am Grace Kelly. Grace Kelly is me."

Dorota meeting Cyndi Lauper was absolute magic. Also pointed out by my roommate and wholly agreed upon from me - it was weird having Cyndi Lauper come to play Blair's party and then never having us see it happen.

I was really glad when Serena said "Thanks for the condescending lecture" to that dickhead Aaron because it was exactly what I was thinking except I would have said something more along the lines of - "alright, fuck off."

Alright, well I think that's it. Pretty weak episode, I'd say especially in comparison to the last two. Scenes for next week look good what with the return of The Captain, so hopefully we'll have less Aaron though that, unfortunately, seems unlikely.

Final Rating: C

Really Quick

And I'm sure everyone will disagree with me on this, but the scene where Lil' J and Agnes crash Lily and Bart's society party and put on the impromptu fashion show is, up to this point, the single greatest moment in Gossip Girl history.

Mostly because of the cover of "Sheena is a Punk Rocker" by Jemina Pearl, formerly of Be Your Own Pet, and Thurston Moore.

It was awesome. It captured the spirit of the show in all it's debaucherous glory.

I really loved it.

The CW took the video down, I wanted to embed it. If you haven't seen it, really try. Lil' J is awesome.

Apologies...Apologies All

I've been super busy and unable to write. Gossip Girl was great and all is right with the world as I REALLY hate Dan Humphrey, Lil' J however, might be my favorite character at this moment.

Sorry ya'll

I've got Drive-By Truckers and the Hold Steady on Friday night - should be the greatest show of all time despite Terminal 5.

Be back next week...