I have some sad news. I broke up with Kenley last night.
For those of you who don’t know, Kenley and I started our brief affair about two months ago when I first saw her on the premier of Project Runway's latest season. She was spunky and adorable, she had great style and I really thought we had something.
But it was fleeting.
We hit our first rough patch when she mockingly laughed when her “best friend” Daniel claimed to have exquisite taste on the runway. “Why would you do that, Kenley” I said. “I mean I know it’s a ridiculous statement to make seeing as how Daniel is a terrible designer with really greasy hair, but he’s supposed to be your friend. Are you gonna turn on me at some point?” I said.
Turns out, the answer was yes. Sort of.
Then Kenley met Diane Von Furstenburg and turned into a blubbery mess, which should have been endearing, but it wasn’t it was really annoying and as a result, there were more cracks in the foundation of our budding relationship.
I tried to tell myself that it wasn’t Kenley at all, it was the editing. They need a Project Runway villain and suddenly, without warning it turned out to not be Suede.
(Sure, Suede’s annoying, but he’s also pretty pathetic. I mean he’s in his forties. He looks ridiculous. It was hard to hate him and easier to feel pity for the absurdity that is Suede.)
But, I don’t think that’s the case anymore, I think she may just be a villain.
You see, Kenley reminds me of a girl I went to high school with who, so it seemed, was full of confidence. As I got older I realized that confidence was just masking deeper seeded insecurities. That’s Kenley. She reminds me of a high school student.
I don’t need a high school kid, Kenley. You need to grow up.
So last night during the challenge when Kenley dismissed Tim’s suggestions in such a snobby fashion, I ended it. Tim’s the best, Kenely and he was just trying to help.
So it’s with a heavy heart that I make this announcement. I’m pretty surprised we didn’t last the whole season, or at least until her inevitable banishment from the runway (let’s face it, she ain’t beating Korto or Leanne), but we didn’t.
I’d like to say we had a good run, but that’s not really the case. We had a good two or three episodes and we probably would have broken up sooner had the glorious Stella not been there to distract me from all of Kenley’s flaws.
So that’s it. I’ll be fine. It may just take a few days.